|
-
-
|
-
|
|
-
Examining the
Issue...
Currently, there is much legal activity in the United
States surrounding the possibility of legalizing gay
marriages. Regardless, same-sex couples have been going ahead and
celebrating public ceremonies of commitment
for many years. In fact, the number of such ceremonies has been increasing.
The determinatin of the gay community to legalize unions
between same-sex couples continues to face denunciation from conservative
voices who assert that, by nature and divine will, only relationships between
men and women are acceptable. Furthermore, there is also an uneasiness
expressed by some lesbian and gay activists
who, recalling the challenge to traditional patriarchy made by 1970's feminism,
see the institution of marriage as being
irretrievably heterosexual.
Although, same-sex marriages have been universally common
in the past in other non-Western cultures. Same-sex marital relationships,
far from being recent manifestations of American gay politics, have been
acceptable to people in a wide range of periods and cultures. Therefore,
the implication drawn is that they are possible and even justifiable.
-
Defining the
Word "Marriage"...
For example, the Roman Catholic Church defines marriage
as "...a sacramental union entered into permanently between one baptized
man and one baptized woman." With such a definition, the very idea
of same sex marriage becomes meaningless. Yet, the issue cannot be settled
by singular definitions. Even conservative religious sources acknowledge
that real marriages exist in many forms that cannot be forced to fit into
simple models. For instance, it would be pointless to deny that polygamous
marriages are real marriages.
No one denies that committed (and even long term) same-sex
relationships have occurred in many diverse cultures. Such private relationships
are not what we consider as marriage any more than we would consider all
long-term romantic relationships between
men and women to be marriages. When we do try to separate marriage from
other unified relationships, we are forced to realize that there are no
simple lines of demarcation.
-
-
Considering the
Many Variations...
Historically and culturally, the types of relationships
that are called by the words we would translate as "marriage" have, in
fact, comprised some wildly divergent arrangements:
-
Relationships between one man and many women. (polygamy - in many societies,
for example Islam, ancient Israel)
-
Relationships between one man with a chief wife and subordinate wives/concubines.
(China)
-
Relationships between one woman and many men. (polyandry - Tibet)
-
Age difference relationships between
one man and one woman where the man was usually an adult well into his
thirties and the woman still in her early teens (e.g. Classical Athens,
Renaissance Italy)
-
Relationships in which one man and one woman marry at close to the same
age but without ever having met before. (Among some Orthodox Jews and in
many Indian and Chinese societies)
-
Relationships in which one man and one woman marry because they love each
other. (so-called "companionate marriage" - the modern norm, and often
traced back to the Protestant Reformers views on marriage)
In all these cases the relationships have been referred to
as marriages. What such "marriage relationships" seem to have in
common are these factors:
-
Domestic cohabitation
-
Communal recognition
-
Customary rules of conduct
-
Some sort of ceremonial inception
-
Some extension in time
Not included as essential are:
-
Legal recognition: marriage exists in societies without legal functions,
or non-legal marriage is recognized even in "legally-minded" societies
(e.g. in modern Scotland it is still possible to be married by "habit and
repute").
-
Love relationships.
-
Child-rearing: children are often desired,
but are not required.
-
Monogamy.
-
Permanence: divorce or permanent separation
is allowed is most societies.
However, in modern American and Western European society,
other factors than those offered in the list above are almost always expected
in what is defined as "marriage". These include:
-
Emotional commitment
-
Legal recognition
-
Monogamy
-
Domestic cohabitation
-
Public, or semi public, ceremonies of union
-
Communal recognition
-
Changing Attitudes
Around the World...
From the beginning of the 19th century until the 1950s,
there was an ongoing campaign against homosexual activity throughout the
Western world, first on legal grounds, then medical. Although, there
is some evidence of women's romantic friendships being accepted in some
circles, for most gay and lesbian people any public acknowledgment of relationships
was simply dangerous. Even France, where the ideal of the French Revolution
was strong enough to prevent the criminalization homosexuality, it was
still condemned and denigrated by the medical profession.
However, since the late 1960s in Europe, homosexuality
has become much more accepted. Gay marriage is now acceptable in Denmark,
Norway and Sweden, with Finland, Slovenia and the Netherlands (and possibly
Iceland and the Czech Republic) expected to follow suit soon. Gay common
law marriage has also been recognized in Hungary.
Gay marriage in the United States is a new concept.
In 1971, a Minnesorta court case, Baker vs. Nelson, involved
the first same-sex marriage to be tried in this country. It ruled
against the plaintiffs, Richard John Baker and James Michael McConnell.
The court rejected the case by stating that "The institution of marriage
as a union of man and woman, uniquely involving the procreation and rearing
of children within a family, is as old as the book of Genesis."
By 1977, the backlash associated with Anita Bryant and
her successful attack on gay rights led to a need to focus energies on
protecting the gains already made. Then, in the early 1980s, AIDS dominated
the entire lesbian and gay agenda. It may have been discussions around
AIDS and its cultural effects, however, which lead to a re-emergence of
the same-sex marriage question. In the first place, AIDS dulled the exaltation
of multiple partners celebrated by both male gay culture and gay leaders
in the 1970s. Another aspect of the AIDS epidemic was that, like
all the apparent disasters in modern gay and lesbian history, it encouraged
closeted gays to come out publically and furthered the creation of a self-confident
and increasingly self-assured lesbian and gay community. With the visible
moral bravery of so many gays and lesbians, it became much easier to throw
off ingrained heterosexist prejudices that gays were unloving, unstable
and inherently immoral. The epidemic has buried such beliefs, at least
for the public lesbian and gay community.
By 1992, a Newsweek survey reported that 58% of it's respondents
disapprove of gay marriage; 35% approve, and 7% are still unsure.
Presently, same sex marriages are still illegal in the
United States. The gay and lesbian community considers this issue
to be primary on their agenda. Whether or not they succeed will eventually
be determined in the future. However, we can have no doubt that their
efforts will continue without ceasing until such unions are considered
to be legal. |
-
|
-
-
--
|
-
-
-
-
The mission of this not-for-profit website is to promote clear insights
and toleration regarding the many variations of primary relationships that
exist in our world. We ask for neither acceptance or approval but
hope that each visitor who reviews the pages of this site will leave them
with a better understanding of the numerous cultural, historical, preferential,
religious, sexual, and sociological approaches to coupling that have always
existed and will continue to exist as long as there are at least two human
beings living on this planet. If the effort put into creating and
maintaining this site results in others coming to the realization that
the basic human need to love and be loved takes on many forms which are
accepted by those who practice them, whether right or wrong as determined
by the personal belief system of others, then it will have served it's
purpose well. |
-
|
