Defined: The legal union of a man and woman as
husband and wife.
| Someone once said that it takes
two to do the Tango. Just as a couple dancing together must do so
in harmony, a good marriage relationship is based on understanding the
steps and executing them together with accuracy and grace. If they
are to continue an ongoing and even more mutually fulfilling love for each
other, their dance routine will take lots of practice and a willingness
by both to stay in rhythm together.
When life gets hectic and there
is much to do (e.g. family, children, work, etc.), the two of you will
face many times when you are both dancing "free-style" just to be able
to deal with all that is happening around you. However, the point
to be made here is that it is important to work through everything together.
Too many couples find themselves in trouble when they drift away from each
other in regard to how they determine to face every situation and challenge.
One of the many benefits of a loving,
committed marriage is that of being able to deal with life and all of its
complicated moments with someone else who will stand by your side at all
times. Facing difficulties alone is something that all of us are
certainly capable of doing but having a mate who is involved and supportive
makes such challenges less intimidating and much more workable.
Fast dance together even if your
style is a little different from one another.
If dancing cheek to cheek characterizes
your marriage relationship, then you would be wise to keep holding him/her
close to you and two-stepping your way through life together. Be
sure to spend nice, quiet moments with each other.
This site has conducted a poll for
men and women over the past two years. With over two-thousand men
and women responding, it is interesting to note that one of the top romantic
moments that couples like to shre is that of cuddling up on the sofa together
to watch an old movie. Such shared "slow dance" experiences are necessary
for any marriage where two people have determined to make it work.
If all you do is fast dance together, you will soon burn out and possibly
find yourself dancing alone.
Being affectionate toward one another
and enjoying regular romantic interludes is the glue that holds a good
There are times when you will get
out of step with each other. One might step on the others toes
from time to time. However, as long as you keep holding on to each
other, you'll better be able to face the more difficult times.
Sometimes the steps in a marriage
have to be choriographed in perfect unison with each other. Although,
there is a little room to accomadate each one's individual "style," the
order of the steps much be the same if the marriage is to survive.
This point is never so clear but
when children come into the picture. They know immediately when their
parents are divided on any
issue regarding them and have the instinctive
ability to take advantage of any disagreement concerning them. Whether
it's a request to allow a friend to stay overnight or how discipline is
to be administered, parents who do not work together every step of the
way will find it difficult to maintain their own relationship should they
disagree on child raising issues.
Another potentially hurtful area
that demands working together in perfect harmony is that of finances.
The statistics tell us that this has become one of the top reasons why
marriages break up. Even though one of you may be entrusted with
paying the bills, both of you should be clear on how much money is coming
in and where it is going out. Keeping one's mate blindsided to how
the finances are being administrated can be desctructive to the relationship.
Be sure that you dance together on this one.
There are certainly other
areas where it is essential that husband and wife stay in step with each
other. You will know them when they arise. Stay together and
you'll do fine.
This is reserved for those who have
really become excellent dancers and are now enjoying more advanced dance
Couples who work together when facing
difficult challenges to their lives and marriages eventually become good
at it. Furthermore, those who enjoy regular romantic moments together
will find that they can better face those same challenges because they
continually reaffirm their love together. Add to that, their ability
to dance in perfect step with each other concerning everything from children
to finances (and any other issue demanding that they do so), and you have
a two people who will one day find themselves more than capable of taking
on greater challenges together and being successful in whatever they decide
to accomplish together.
Even the Tango becomes easy and
they do it beautifully.
Love happens, but, like dancing
together, marriage takes work, practice, and an ongoing growing love for
© all rights reserved - 10/22/2001
The mission of this not-for-profit website is to promote clear insights
and toleration regarding the many variations of primary relationships that
exist in our world. We ask for neither acceptance or approval but
hope that each visitor who reviews the pages of this site will leave them
with a better understanding of the numerous cultural, historical, preferential,
religious, sexual, and sociological approaches to coupling that have always
existed and will continue to exist as long as there are at least two human
beings living on this planet. If the effort put into creating and
maintaining this site results in others coming to the realization that
the basic human need to love and be loved takes on many forms which are
accepted by those who practice them, whether right or wrong as determined
by the personal belief system of others, then it will have served it's