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Virtual Courtship:
The New Wave...
It's fast replacing traditional courtship.
Contacting perspective mates via the Internet is now an
accepted and much appreciated contemporary method of courting.
In this fast paced world that we live in, who has
time to search for their soulmate in bars,
churches, or our places of employment? Of course, it still happens
but, due to the growing popularity of the Internet, what was once assumed
to be the way it was done. Now, all you have to do is join one of
the many popular singles
search websites and you can view hundreds of profiles with photos of
people living in your area who are looking for someone just like you.
Furthermore, Internet connecting is more secure.
You can remain as anonymous as you like for as long as you want.
By limiting your contact to several weeks of e-mail correspondence, you
can learn much more about another person than you would otherwise. In fact,
no previous form of courtship ever gave anyone the capability to get to
know a love interest as
well.
You can instant message each other whenever you like and
enjoy some light hearted chatting with each other or even discuss serious
philosophical views. After chatting, e-mail corresponding, and instant
messaging each other, the first phone calls will feel more like talking
to an old friend than the usual strangeness that accompanies those early
voice contacts. With the advent of web cams, you can even see each
other while conversing in a chatroom that is equipped with voice microphones
(check out Yahoo's chatrooms for this).
All of this and, yet, you will not have even stood in
the same room together.
No wonder, the Internet is becoming the best and
most effective way to meet other singles. |
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Chatrooms: Where
It All Began....
I will never forget my first experience with visiting
a chatroom. After investigating several different themed rooms on
the old Prodigy Classic Internet service, I found my way to their "Books
and Writing" room. It was filled with would- be writers and poets.
In fact, our main entertainment was sharing our original
poems. We'd actually cut and paste them to the chatroom screen.
The standing rule was to
announce that you would like to display a poem. Then, everyone
would stop chatting and read the lines scrolling out your poetry in front
of them. When finished, each would give a short response. It
was a fun room and I actually got to know some of the people in the room
well enough to phone call them. However, in this case, it was two
of the men who helped me with some new things I was learning about web
site construction. At any rate, I was absolutely enthralled by the
interactive feature afforded by this new chatroom phenomenon. What
fun!
Chatrooms are now everywhere on the net. They come
in all shapes and sizes with different features and graphical lay-outs.
The older versions are now easily obtainable by even those who have personal
web sites to incorporate in as a nice feature for family and friends.
However, all of them are intended to give people a way to meet and communicate
with others whom they would never have had access to otherwise. You
can chat with people from Australia, Canada, Brazil, the United Kingdom,
and Saudi Arabia--all at the same time. On the other hand, you can
go to rooms that are limited to just your corner of the state in which
you live. Whatever you want, it's out there somewhere.
If you are looking for romance,
you could very well find it in a chatroom.
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Chatrooms: Ever
Evolving Technology...
They
started out with a single field across the bottom where the user would
simply key in their message to be added to the lines of text in the room.
Then, the "pvt" (request for
a private chat) appeared. By clicking the nickname of another chatter
in the room, you could get his/her attention to ask for a pvt. Instant
messengers became popular as well. Being alerted when a friend had
signed on to the Internet enables you to send them a message requesting
a chat.
This was followed by sound
technology. If you have a combination microphone-headphones set,
you can request a voice chat. Now, hearing each other's voices while
you chat has become commonplace.
Now, we have web cams.
Seeing each other while you are chatting is the new trend.
Consequently, in less than
five years, we have gone from keying in text to actually hearing the voice
and seeing the person with whom we are chatting.
What will the technology come
up with next?
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Singles Search
Services: The Next Step...
Not too long ago, I shared my Internet romance insights
with a guy who was recently divorced.
He actually purchased his first computer for the purpose of possibly finding
someone via the net. I even snapped some photos of him in front of
his house so that he could use them to set up a Match.com
profile. It wasn't long before he started corresponding with some
nearby single women and has since dated
several of them.
My friend is both an ethical and good man. This is not
always the case but I do think that most people who use singles search
services are genuinely hoping to find a serious relationship. If
not, they are usually up front about it for. The predators do give
this new courtship approach a bit of a bad name but I am personally convinced
that the medium will overcome any stigma because it has absolutely revolutionized
how men and women are meeting each other.
Singles search services are here to stay because
they work. They are not the wave of the future.
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E-mail: Knowing Before
Meeting...
This
quick and easy method of sending messages across the miles has contributed
much to this virtual courtship
revolution.
Traditional courting is slowly disappearing.
The Internet is replacing how single people
find each other. All of the above tools have simplified our ability
to locate someone who fits whatever criteria one might choose.
However, once found, e-mail becomes
the way strangers become friends and then finally agree to meet
when both are comfortable doing so. In fact, it has become the preferred
way for people to get to know each other. There is little risk,
no pressure, no commitment, and you can back out any time if so inclined.
Conversely, should you really click together, several weeks or more of
corresponding can create a kind of virtual friendship.
Perceptions and view points can be discussed concerning life, love,
and whatever else two people want to share with each other. The "net"
effect is that the experience of a meeting becomes more like two friends
getting together. It is neither a blind date
or a meeting of strangers. You actually know how the other person
thinks in regard to a number of topics that were covered using e-mail.
As a result, the fact that you already like each other as people makes
any first meeting less stressful and that much more enjoyable.
In this brave new world, it
only stands to reason that technology would eventually govern how we even
find love. In this case, the computer
has triumphed. No other method of meeting other singles works as
effectively.
As each day goes by, more
and more people are discovering this to be true. There is no indication
that this approach will cool down or eventually be passed off as a fad.
It works. It continues to
work.
The Internet has revolutionized
courtship.
Those who use it, will eventually
find their special someones. Those who remain ignorant or have no
interest in it, will have to rely on the slower, less effective traditional
approach.
However, I'm willing to bet good
money that those who use the net will be much more successful. |
© all rights reserved - 10/22/2001-
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The mission of this not-for-profit website is to promote clear insights
and toleration regarding the many variations of primary relationships that
exist in our world. We ask for neither acceptance or approval but
hope that each visitor who reviews the pages of this site will leave them
with a better understanding of the numerous cultural, historical, preferential,
religious, sexual, and sociological approaches to coupling that have always
existed and will continue to exist as long as there are at least two human
beings living on this planet. If the effort put into creating and
maintaining this site results in others coming to the realization that
the basic human need to love and be loved takes on many forms which are
accepted by those who practice them, whether right or wrong as determined
by the personal belief system of others, then it will have served it's
purpose well. |
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