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   In the grand scheme of the universe, our lives are not to even be compared with a grain of sand.  When one considers the eons of time that have transpired throughout the course of eternity past and that which is yet to come, not to mention this planet's miniscule place in this limitless and immense universe, each of our lives 
are but a fleeting moment.  Our lifespans of three-score and ten years barely even register a blip in the history of this ancient cosmos.
   When one further considers that the odds of being born are akin to winning every state lottery at the same time, the very fact that you and I exist at all becomes a case of mind-boggling luck.  Afterall, are not each of us the result of countless generations of coupling?  All of those people had to meet each other, fall in love, make love, conceive children, and then, somewhere down the line, your two parents got together and, out of millions of sperm and as many eggs, you were conceived.  The very reality of our existences is a miracle so stupendous that no one can even begin to calculate the odds.
   With all of that being said, the concept of two people finding within each other what love, friendship, companionship, caring, mutually shared experiences, and history we as humans seem to need is all the more amazing.  Furthermore, those who find their true soulmates would do well to consider themselves all the more blessed.  Finding such a person goes beyond the normal need for physical intimacy.  It reaches down in to our very souls where no one else is allowed to go--that place where only those who are most special can reside.
   Once more, such a find transcends time.  Those who fall in love too easily find themselves disappointed within months or even weeks.  Others make one compromise after another to stay with someone who is either little deserving of their love (because of a refusal to deal with their own demons) or so incompatible that any kind of mutual harmony is impossible.  Thus, that kind of a "relationship" becomes one of making great sacrifice just to stay together or eventually yet one more divorce case for the courts.  However, the love between true soulmates is one that is recognized almost immediately, proves itself to be amazingly compatible, and, regarding those few areas where there might be differences, finds easy and comfortable ways to bridge the gaps.  Thus, the chances of such love lasting forever is increased a hundred-fold.  Otherwise, when adding this to the previous considerations, we are compelled to conclude that those who have truly found their special someone are living a life that can only be described as infinitely miraculous.
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   Yet, most of us take such things in stride.  Few ever truly meditate on the amazing number of factors that had to occur from the inception of the universe to their own conception.  Not only do we assume our existence but we eventually begin to take our mates for granted.  Should we never have meditated upon these thoughts or simply forgotten them, a once vibrant and exciting love relationship can become a humdrum and relatively boring reality of everyday life.  To some, it even becomes a prison.
   Perhaps the error in such relationships has to do with the fact that we humans are more than capable of making bad choices.  Due to whatever shortcoming (e.g. immaturity, inexperience, impatience, etc.) might have been a factor in our lives when entering into a relationship, we eventually come to the realization that we made a mistake.  Add to that the many facets of how it is that humans change, it is no wonder that those who have settled for less than someone who continues to be special in their lives eventually want out of the relationship.
   Again, when one considers the brevity of our lifetimes upon this planet, allowing ourselves to have wasted many years in a loveless relationship is worthy of the word "sin."  None of us should ever waste our time with someone who refuses to return our love or should we be guilty of inflicting another with our own lack of a loving, caring responsiveness.  If two people cannot agree to disagree while being absolutely in love with each other, it may be time to conclude the relationship and move on.  An extended period of aloneness might even be more preferable to give one time to sort out the lessons learned and be better prepared to enter into another relationship with a much more mature attitude and greater insightfulness.
   Sometimes in life, we have to lose our way a little before we can ever find it again.
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   Having someone special in our lives is one of life's gifts that only happens on a very limited basis.  It would be nice to think that every beautiful person we meet is automatically and instantaniously attracted to us and we to them.  It doesn't happen that way.  Even if it did, the very fact that a mature understanding of love demands a depth of feeling for another person that reaches deep into our hearts.  Otherwise, those who seem to fall in and out of love at regular intervals are suspect.  Love between two people is more than a magical feeling that lasts for only three months.  The real thing lasts for a lifetime--perhaps beyond.
   Whether you ascribe to the soulmate concept or simply believe that there is someone for everyone, there is no doubt that we humans have always wanted to believe that love and the object of our love are both special--even unique.  Just as our own existences are the result absolutely fantastic odds, finding someone special to share our lives with is just as wonderous and amazing.
   It's not a myth.  It's not even an exageration.  Being in a loving relationship with someone special is the very best of what anyone of us can ever experience in life.  Wealth, fame, and power are mortal concerns which offer little in the way of genuine fulfillment.  They are not enough to satisfy the soul or fill the heart.  No dying man was ever comforted in his last moments by his riches, his fans, or those whom he held sway over.
   If life has any meaning at all, it only becomes clear the moment that special someone looks deeply into your eyes and says those three words.
© all rights reserved - 5/4/2002
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   The mission of this not-for-profit website is to promote clear insights and toleration regarding the many variations of primary relationships that exist in our world.  We ask for neither acceptance or approval but hope that each visitor who reviews the pages of this site will leave them with a better understanding of the numerous cultural, historical, preferential, religious, sexual, and sociological approaches to coupling that have always existed and will continue to exist as long as there are at least two human beings living on this planet.  If the effort put into creating and maintaining this site results in others coming to the realization that the basic human need to love and be loved takes on many forms which are accepted by those who practice them, whether right or wrong as determined by the personal belief system of others, then it will have served it's purpose well.
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