| The typical perception others have of the
biker lifestyle is that of a tall, leather jean-clad muscular male with
tattoos on both arms riding a Harley down the highway. If his "old
lady" is with him, then she is probably dressed the same way and looking
just as tough.
| Don't let appearances fool you.
These are real people and they have the same basic needs
as all of us. They are simply living a different kind of lifestyle--one
that includes big Harley cycles, "hawgs," "wenches," and regular trips
to biker meets all over the country and even the world.
Sasha responded to my query concerning how it is that
men and women in the biker culture relate to each other. She stated
it this way: "Bikers are private about their relationships and one must
be associated with the culture to understand the beauty of love in the
Although, it is true that bikers and their "old ladies"
are not as open about their relationships, one can gain insights into how
they relate to each other when considering the whole of their culture.
The sight of two sleeveless leather-jacketed figures on a Harley motorcycle
is not uncommon. Their manner of dress, speech, and attitudes are
purposely designed to skirt the edges of the law and accepted behaviour.
This carries over into their primary relationships
Another interesting aspect of bikers has to do with the
names they choose for themselves. Each couple is known to other bikers
by such nicknames as BadBiker69 & HarleeQwin, HDBadass & SmackMe,
BlastMe & RubyRider, and Drifter & Boxie.
Females are expected to be submissive to their male counterparts.
The more brash and "bitchy," the better. Whether it's flashing
their breasts at large gatherings of bikers or simply hanging on to
their men while riding together, Harley women are more than willing to
behave as expected in this unique subculture.
Yet, bikers still do many of the things that others do
when it comes to mixing the two sexes together. For example, the
Kentucky Motorcycle Association sponsors an annual "Biker Ball Halloween
Bash." Special prizes are given to the club with the largest representation
as well as the best decorated bike. There you have it--bikers enjoy
Shared Love for the Road...
One biker couple describes themselves this way, "We met
in the spring of 1994, got engaged a
couple of years later at Mardi Gras in New Orleans and we've been happily
since July of 1996. Our honeymoon
was a 3 week
camping/cross-country trip on our BMW K100LT. Near the
end of the trip, two days from home, she wanted equal time in the saddle
and purchased her first BMW ('92 K75) and rode the rest of the way home
next to me. After 20 days and 7,000 miles of adventures, we
were still happily married and ready to
take on the world!"
The two elements of travel and getting together with other
bikers is what drives this culture. Couples relate to each other
based on the accepted behaviour, attitudes, and morals of the group.
In this case, males represent being macho to the extreme and females respect
their men by demonstrating a tough exterior, although submissive to them
at all times.
| Yet another biker couple points out the aspect
of their love for travel, "Among our friends and family
we are known as the couple that changes travel plans every day. We dream
and fantasize about new places to visit, places to settle down for a while,
and job opportunities that will take us to remote and exotic places. Most
of it are dreams, but lately we have surprised ourselves by converting
some of them to reality. Traveling is definitely in our blood."
Bikers are a breed unto themselves. Their lifestyle is clearly defined
by their clothing, the way they relate to each other, and their love of
the open road; not to mention their motorcycles. A biker could never
relate to a woman who was not willing to be his old lady and share the
lifestyle with him. Conversely, biker babes are drawn to men who
are deeply involved in the culture.
Still, as in all types of primary relationship groups,
there is much variation. Just as there are those couples whose relationship
is marked by violent behaviour,
there are many more who truly love and respect each other. It's simply
one more way that men and women share their interests and lifestyles.
It's how they relate best--the joy of experiencing together
"the beauty of love in the wind."
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The mission of this not-for-profit website is to promote clear insights
and toleration regarding the many variations of primary relationships that
exist in our world. We ask for neither acceptance or approval but
hope that each visitor who reviews the pages of this site will leave them
with a better understanding of the numerous cultural, historical, preferential,
religious, sexual, and sociological approaches to coupling that have always
existed and will continue to exist as long as there are at least two human
beings living on this planet. If the effort put into creating and
maintaining this site results in others coming to the realization that
the basic human need to love and be loved takes on many forms which are
accepted by those who practice them, whether right or wrong as determined
by the personal belief system of others, then it will have served it's